Love my life
It's taken me a very long time to really like my life and realize I was in the drivers seat. Now that I've gotten that lesson, onward and upward I go.
I have my partner in life, a place that belongs to us, friends and neighbors that are blessings, and we have love. Wow, this is what life is about. Of course, I'd rather be on the road in the RV but, for now this is good. Laurie is more of a stay at home and nest kind of gal, and I'm more get out there and explore. But for now, this is where I am supposed to be, doing what I'm suppose to do.
Funny when you find your purpose how different you feel. How fulfilled and how it all just feels right. I'm in the right spot, right kind of thinking, and just getting life in general. Wow, how off track I was at one time. We won't get into that, because I believe we all get off track one time or another in their lives. We just have to learn from the lesson, forgive and move forward with a new attitude and your new found lessons.
I used to think it's the stuff in your life that made you successful. I now know it has nothing to do with what you own. I know for a fact someone that was in my life over 30 years ago, that has all kinds of THINGS, but has no substance in her life. No companion, no real friends, but lots of stuff. I'm sad for her, because she feels the need to pick on me. But I get it. I forgive her and pray for her and that she will understand it's the way she acts that turn people off. She's never done any work on herself. That is a must. I am still hoping my daughter will soon start her work.
I know coming to this point in my life wasn't easy because I'm very stubborn. I dig my heals in and no one or nothing is going to move me. I've softened this thought wave. I now listen, I have an open heart.
Having an Open Heart
My friend Dory told me years ago, when your heart opens wide, you can never ever shut it. She was so right. Since having my heart opened up in 09, I've never thought of the world in the same way.
I had to take responsibility for my action, fix what I could, and forgive myself for all I've done up until that moment. It's the best thing I ever did for myself. I thank the Great Spirit for all my gifts. I deserve every one of them, and I've earned them as well.
I think you must at times earn your blessings. I know that sounds silly. But you have to be in a certain place in your life in order to get the lessons life is trying to teach you. And they will present themselves to you. And will continue to do so until you GET IT.
I really believe that we do come here knowing our purpose. One we choose before even getting here. Everything I've gone through has made me a better person one way or another. I'm excited when I think about the future. I never thought that way before. I know I will have an enormous impact on my Grand children while they are here.
I think this is a fantastic gift. Having my Grandchildren come here and see how I live. There are so many rumors and lies that are still being spread about me and my life in Louisiana, I am hoping that this will show them the truth. But ya know, it's only really effecting the people spreading the lies. This just gives me a chance to show them different.
Curses to those that keep their Grandchildren from their families. I've seen this so much in my life. Where the kids are pissed at their parents for whatever reason and keep the grandkids away from the grandparents. There is a special hell for those kind of people. I know my daughter is living her hell. I'm sad for her, and her kids because they are missing out on ONE FANTASTIC GRANDMA! But I know my time will come with them as well. Everything she has done to me will be done to her, so I expect the kids to be reaching out to me before too long.
I'm so blessed to be able to get to know Cory's kids. Emily the second oldest wants to learn to be a clown. I'm thrilled to say the least. Heidi's daughter Harley wanted to be a clown too. She even painted her face with Heidi's lipstick and pretended to be me. I love it. Heidi shared this with me before she decided I was the devil.
These kids are so special. But every Grandma thinks that. I just know to be able to have 4 generations of clowns in our side of the family is so special. My Mother would be so proud. She is! She is with me daily and guides me now because I listen. I didn't listen before. Wish I had. Children have an innocents that even parents can't take away for at least a little while. Be careful what you say around your kids, they hear it all. Even if they don't know what it all means at the time they retain it and carry it for their lifetimes. I wish I'd been a better parent, Mother, daughter, wife, partner, and friend. But I have today and hopefully tomorrow to improve and be the best person I can be now.
That is why I love every day. It's my way of being able to start again. Be the new and improved me.
Thank you to all my living and dead friends and relatives for helping me in my journey. Thank you for your continued love and guidance.
I'm beyond blessed.
I think this is a fantastic gift. Having my Grandchildren come here and see how I live. There are so many rumors and lies that are still being spread about me and my life in Louisiana, I am hoping that this will show them the truth. But ya know, it's only really effecting the people spreading the lies. This just gives me a chance to show them different.
Curses to those that keep their Grandchildren from their families. I've seen this so much in my life. Where the kids are pissed at their parents for whatever reason and keep the grandkids away from the grandparents. There is a special hell for those kind of people. I know my daughter is living her hell. I'm sad for her, and her kids because they are missing out on ONE FANTASTIC GRANDMA! But I know my time will come with them as well. Everything she has done to me will be done to her, so I expect the kids to be reaching out to me before too long.
I'm so blessed to be able to get to know Cory's kids. Emily the second oldest wants to learn to be a clown. I'm thrilled to say the least. Heidi's daughter Harley wanted to be a clown too. She even painted her face with Heidi's lipstick and pretended to be me. I love it. Heidi shared this with me before she decided I was the devil.
These kids are so special. But every Grandma thinks that. I just know to be able to have 4 generations of clowns in our side of the family is so special. My Mother would be so proud. She is! She is with me daily and guides me now because I listen. I didn't listen before. Wish I had. Children have an innocents that even parents can't take away for at least a little while. Be careful what you say around your kids, they hear it all. Even if they don't know what it all means at the time they retain it and carry it for their lifetimes. I wish I'd been a better parent, Mother, daughter, wife, partner, and friend. But I have today and hopefully tomorrow to improve and be the best person I can be now.
That is why I love every day. It's my way of being able to start again. Be the new and improved me.
Thank you to all my living and dead friends and relatives for helping me in my journey. Thank you for your continued love and guidance.
I'm beyond blessed.
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